The view isn’t much different on this side of the border but it feels different. Everything looks bigger. Feels emptier. I know a line on a map don’t make anybody any safer if someone wants to put a bullet in my head but it’s different, just crossing that line. Got a whole other country behind me now. I’m not about to get sloppy or nothing, thinking they won’t come gunning, but it feels like we just put a fuck of a lot of space between us.
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Didn’t expect her to laugh.
“What’s so funny?”
It takes her a minute to stop. Marbles used to get me like that. Back when he was a kid and shit he did was funny and not just a pain in my fucking ass. Little fuck used to get me all the damned time. Swear he timed it. Fucking milk or coke’d be flying outta my nose, the fuck. She’s laughing like that. Coughing. I wait till she stops.
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Don’t matter where I am, every fucking diner looks exactly the same, more or less. This one’s a little cleaner. That’s about it for difference.
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Just cus I said I don’t got to call nobody anymore don’t mean I don’t got nobody to call if I need to. Right now I need to. Crossing the border never used to be a big deal. Still isn’t most of the time, but Rita doesn’t even have ID and that could jam us up if somebody decides they’re gonna do their job that day. I don’t expect nothing to happen but I didn’t live this long by being stupid.
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All this shit’s supposed to be confusing and I know a lot a guys that’d be on the fucking phone calling for help the minute shit went sideways. Or they’d be pulled off the side of the road, puking their fucking guts out. What does it say about me that I never been either one a them guys?
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Place hasn’t fucking changed at all. I don’t know what I was expecting but I wasn’t exactly expecting that everything would look the fucking same as it did the first time. I got the cold sweats and let go of the wheel, wiping my hands on my legs. All the shit I seen and this fucking place scares the shit out of me. How’s that for fucked up?
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